Just a Game

I play hide and seek in notebook pages


writing a pretty line here and there

then losing it in the chaotic recesses of my mind

I play hide and seek between delicate, piano hands

covered with intricate pen designs

Pretending they are my eyelids

if I keep them closed

I can't explore the sides of life like a lover

I play hide and seek with artwork

running around looking from my favorites

realizing every dissonant sound is just another chord plucked perfectly

every brush strokes is just an extra layer of genius

These realizations of power made me want to be found

so I make my voice heard from behind every church pew

and even through my shyness I cannot hold the music back

I play the notes

I play hide and seek with equations

I watch numbers run one way and letters the other

scattering quickly to the wind's breath

in this rumble of chaos that defines order

I play hide and seek with disasters

Hiding from earthquakes

praying hunger and poverty aren't very good at seeking

looking behind curtains for heartbreaks and headaches

so I don't rush headlong into them

I play hide and seek with sickness

listening to muttered voices behind curtains

I could swear it was a cocktail party with cheeses and wine

celebrating health and pretending that curtain has no secrets

they won't even try to find me

I don't play hide and seek with emotions

with them I play tag

pavement pounding feet

as the earth and fire mix paint that keeps my face black

I pretend I am 1, 2, 3 steps from base

even though I know the safe zone is always 1, 2, 3 steps out of bounds,

in a dark, unrendered world I can never reach

I keep running, but I can already feel emotions caressing my spine and twisting my veins

Childhood songs play on loud speakers that don't exist

Childhood dreams become nightmares

Even a simple smile is sinister

I know I am almost over taken