A walk

I wish I was a tree.
I would have leaves
dying yellow to see you,
And lilies hanging upside down from my branches
so that you can reach up and pick them.
I would be everything you ask for
and there would be nothing that could hold me back.
Its not that I am not emotional,
its that my emotions drip like sap down my throat
and stick in my bark covered spirals.
My body is full of the twists and confusion
of a clear cut choice.
But i took root so i wouldn't have to choose,
then reached my branches to the sky to be free.
You see, I cant make up my mind.
So. When you cut my down and use me as firewood
I hope that I finally did something right by your red, drippy eyes.
And its not that I can hate,
Its that you make me despise you with every squirrel buried deep.
So I wish I was a tree.
Then I could build myself into a fort
and still steal a piece of the sky.
Then I would be perfect by me.